Cat doesn’t know what to do with the butterfly that flew on its paw.
I can’t breathe I’m laughing too hard
Am I a cat dreaming that I am a butterfly, or a butterfly dreaming that I am a cat…?
the notebook problem: you see a notebook. you want to buy the notebook. but you know you have like TEN OTHER NOTEBOOKS. most which are STILL EMPTY. you don’t need to notebook. you’re probably not gonna use the notebook anyway. what’s the point? DONT BUY THE NOTEBOOK. you buy the notebook.
When the singularity is achieved, human emotions will be supplanted by reaction GIFs.
Secret Teacher: I can’t take the stress, but I don’t want to be a dropout statistic
It’s really difficult to switch off. Every film, book, TV show, article is a potential teaching resource, links in thematically with what you’re currently teaching, or makes use of language techniques that you want to present to students.
It is actually hard sometimes to watch a film just as a film, for enjoyment.
The blue sky arced overhead like the inside of perfect eggshell; he felt safe and secure under that fragile dome. “Greensleeves” carried across the green behind him, slightly off key, while the ocean before him gently lulled and shushed at his attention. He lowered his sunglasses at the glare of a million shards of sunlight reflecting off the gently rippled ocean. A shadow briefly flittered overhead - a seagull - the only thing between him and the perfect, nostalgic blue of the sky.
He unbuttoned and shrugged off his white cotton shirt, dropping it haphazardly next to his thongs and towel in the white, fluffy sand of Balmoral Beach, and strode purposefully towards the water. The ice-cream truck had moved further down the beach, taking the tortured “Greensleeves” with it, and the waves beckoned with a welcoming hush and rolling susurration.
He dove into the water, remembering at the last moment that he still had his sunglasses, and felt a brief moment of anxiety when he surfaced, his glasses askew and the full bright sunlight assaulting his naked eyes. In the brightness and motion, salt and dripping sea he thought he saw a figure, a silhouette standing near his discarded shirt and towel; he couldn’t be sure, but he thought he looked familiar somehow. Was that a moustache beneath the aviators worn by the man on the beach? It looked a lot like a dusty photograph he had on his dresser back at home.
“Outta the way, man!” yelled a grommet on a boogy-board and a wave smacked against the back of his head hard, jolting him out of his reverie. When he surfaced again the man in the aviators was gone.
Vignette written using Jodi Cleghorn’s template at http://writeanything.wordpress.com/2009/08/17/vignette-a-writing-exercise/
I have found this does wonders for students who struggle to come up with ideas for in-class creative writing assessments.
my friend left her window open in her bedroom and came back to find this
look at his self-satisfied little face, the cheeky shit
if there was a post to describe australia, this is it
you mean to tell me this isn’t even a pet bird?
that in australia, you have wild birds that just fly from house to house with the express purpose of fucking shit up?
fucking HELL australia, what is wrong with you?
wake up australia
That’s what birds do
They fly around and fuck shit up
Do you have some kind of mysterious nice birds in your weird foreign country
Do birds in America and England fly into your house and make the bed and tidy up the living room a little bit
It’s cold here, so they just bounce off the windows and lie there and twitch spasmodically while you look for the shovel.
Basically hurling themselves at windows is the worst thing birds do
yeah man a kookaburra literally flew into a classroom at my high school and just sat his smug ass down on top of the desk for a good 20 minutes
why has nobody mentioned the fact that in australia there are 3-4 months a year where everybody just accepts that they’re going to get attacked by magpies. It is literally called “swooping season” and these birds will fly down to peck your fucking face, and people get their eyes ripped out and shit, it’s fucking brutal.
My teacher had to go to hospital and have surgery because of swooping season. It was in the parking lot of school and all the kids would do a mad dash towards the car as the magpies tried to kill us.
no but when you’re 12 years old and riding your bike like mad on the way home from school with an icecream bucket on your head with like branches and shit sticking out if it to scare them off and none of this is considered strange
what the actual fuck australia
I have a fear of swooping birds from being attacked when I was 4, in kinda.
I have also seen kookaburras fearlessly swoop down and pick a steak off a searing hot BBQ hotplate, just like fuck you, I’m gonna eat that hunk of meat fool.
Sarah Schönfeld - All You Can Feel
"Since the 1950s, we in the western world have increasingly come to understand our most intimate desires and experiences as the products of a so-called ‘chemical self’. We can explain moods, angers and diseases both physiological and psychological as an imbalance of substances in the body.
All of this, of course, takes place against the backdrop of a constantly shifting legal and political climate regarding the regulation of different types of mood-altering substances.
What do all these substances actually look like when their essence is visually depicted?
Schönfeld squeezed drops of various legal and illegal liquid drug mixtures onto negative film which had
already been exposed. Each drop altered the coating of the film.
Much like the effect of some of these substances on humans, this can be a lengthy process – sometimes one that can barely be stopped.
She then enlarged these negatives including the chemical reaction of the particular drug, to sizes of up to 160 x 200cm.”
4. Crystal Meth
8. Pharmaceutical Speed
The literal negative effects of drugs (on negatives)
I need to talk to my dealer about scoring some “magic”…